by Edwin Strong

Today, everything has ‘tag’ on it as the ‘labelling’ practise supposedly makes it easier for the brain to comprehend situation. Whether the ‘tag’ is price to pay,an indicator of importance,a nickname,or derogatory comment.

The tag of ‘fat ridicule’ can take the target down from great distance. From the schooltime ‘touch game’ where you are always first to be ‘got’,to adulthood when playful comment or just plain confrontational bullying becomes extremely hurtful. If you are ‘fat tagged’,you are target figure and ridicule,in it’s major or minor forms,hurts big time.

The dinner guest, who insists on regaling the other friends with intimate details of his or her intrepid journeys into the darkest jungles of dieting and resultant loss of 18 pounds (around 8 kilograms in metric fat), bears similar yawn factor as the ‘golfing bore’ detailing the texture and color of the blade of grass that prevented his hole in 10. The ‘fat tag’ comes into play and it may be that guests will avoid you if you persist. Losing weight is very personal and it’s only the visual end result that says it all. People will mostly be polite to you as not to be is impolite but if you are still heavily overweight and get the ‘fat tag’, just watch the dinner invitations dwindle. (may be good thing actually?)

If you have lost some overweight,it shows in your talk,your walk,your confidence and self-esteem. Without hesitation we approve and mentally engage, as the proof of the pudding (sorry) is standing in front of us. As ‘desert flower’ blossoms rapidly at the merest hint of rain so also does the ’slimmer’ who achieves glimpse of what is possible. What is needed now is to understand the difference between deserts and desserts. An occasional visit to each is fine but too much of either will kill you.

There are times when we are stripped bare or half clothed. Either way, whether it is prior to lovemaking,daily bathing,beach lounging or dressing,we see our ‘bodily’ self. The conscious reaction to seeing oneself could be to:- (1) Kid our-self that what we see is not that bad (2) Shudder and shake our heads in disbelief at what we have become (3) Admire our-self, what we are or what we have physically achieved

Separation of the ’self’ is of critical importance. This ’self’ is our deep rooted personal identity in life and holds the keys to our mental well-being. Leave it to the psychologists to go deeper BUT if we see our-self as weak and submissive, that is what we become,if we see ourselves as fighter who will not easily give up, that is what we become.

We mentally record deep hurt if ridiculed,no matter if spoken or intimated in the banter of love. The pointed arrow hits an ‘outwardly hidden’ target. In our quiet reflective time the ‘fat-tag’ hurts deeply. Nightly despair quickly bleeds into the day’s routine unless corrective action is taken. Each layer of fat added is measured in degrees of sadness whereas each layer lost causes disproportional elation..

If we see our-self as overweight, then in our own mind we have lost some of our personal identity and lot of self-esteem. So we have to strip the fat and remove some of the lardy layers that weigh even more heavily on our minds. The trick is not to see our-self as impossibly overweight but possibly overweight. We can deal with ‘possibly overweight’ as that self-impression leaves the door open for improvement.

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